Pantslessness! (Or Lack Thereof...?)

So... I had a dream this morning... and it was ALMOST exactly like reality. This is why Ron, Aubrey's boyfriend, didn't come inside at exactly 9am this morning.

So, I wasn't quite conscious... nor was I unconscious...
Here is the dream situation's real and imagined parts:

Real: I was peacefully sleeping on the couch downstairs completely covered by my flowery teal quilt, when I hear that obnoxious knocking... KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!!! I know immediately who it is -- I open my eyes a slit to gauge how much daylight is in the living room, and my calculating mind determines -- it is 9am, or a little afterwards. And there is knocking. So, it must be Ron knocking. Ron nearly always comes in right at 9am. ... Plus, I can hear him speaking Spanish on the phone through the walls...

Now, all this was true...

The following... was not real. But it seemed unbelievably so. Three details did not jive with reality...
1) The blinds of the window next to the door were all the way up, so Ron could see inside. He usually peeks in the window when he's banging on the door to be let in.
2) ... I suddenly realize that my pants were mysteriously missing.
3) ... Underneath my lack of pants were what the girls in my apartment term "Satan's panties" -- Bright. Red. Red. Underwear.

Fortunately, all this pantlessness was underneath my quilt, so it wasn't blatantly obvious to the outside world that Jenna wasn't wearing pants.

But Ron continues to knock and knock and knock...

Oh no, I find myself thinking. I need to let Ron in. It is cold outside! Oh, but I can't get up. I have no pants! I have no pants! Maybe if I get up, really fast, and dash up the stairs -- Oh no, I can't do that!!! Firstly, Ron would know I was awake and I left him outside. But, more importantly -- [I confess, even in my dreams, I tend to the nerdly side...] in the visible spectrum of light, red has the shortest wavelength and is therefore the most noticeable of any color. That means he'll see my underwear! Unacceptable!

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK...

And here I am, pretending to be asleep, chanting in my head, Red is the shortest wavelength... red is the shortest wavelength... red is the shortest wavelength...

And I don't let him in.

The knocking eventually subsides, and I eventually fall from semiconsciousness back into true unconsciousness.

Later... perhaps as much as an hour later, I swim back into consciousness as I hear Aubrey coming down the stairs, on the phone with Ron. "I saw that you called!" She makes a beeline to the door, opens it, and there he is, sitting on the couch.

I pretend to be asleep, still believing I am pantsless... but then I suddenly realize that... I am indeed wearing pants. Thank goodness. But I still continue to be asleep, for fear of being scolded for not letting Ron in. They eventually leave, and I again fall back asleep.