Dodging Boys and Spinning Plates.

Have you ever seen one those variety show guys who spin plates? They go to catch one plate, and a plate on the other side starts to fall... so the plate-spinner runs over to catch that one... another falls... It's an amazing feat if the guy can keep all the plates spinning. I have come to connect with this poor guy. Constantly catching falling plates. It's like my life!

Anyway. Right now is the time where I attempt to juggle all my classes... all my papers... all my midterms... all my finals... all my dates... all my life...

Well, school is the boring part of my life right now. On to what might be considered interesting aspects of my life.

It seems I have become a victim of the attention of quite a few guys. I happen to not mind that Ryan likes me, because he's pretty much just as content as I am to just be friends... who happen to go on dates... every once in a while. Unfortunately, not all the guys around here conveniently don't want girlfriends before their missions like Ryan... take Will for instance. Will is one of those guys who is absolutely determined to get a girlfriend, and I seem to be his current target. Cue the sigh of despair.

I went on a date with him last Friday. Mostly I said yes because of what we were doing... Ok, so he got me at the words "Christmas concert"... The choirs and orchestras were spectacular, really. Especially those basses... Anyway.

Will certainly knows how to make a perfectly nice friendship go awkward. He gets depressed a lot... and then the first thing he thinks (and says aloud because he can't seem to differentiate between thought and the spoken word) is that he needs a girlfriend. And that his life would be magically wonderful if he had one. I always respond to this strange theory of his with hysterical laughter. Then I always make sure to tell him how ridiculous it is and lay down like concrete the fact that I don't have a boyfriend (and don't want one) and I'm perfectly happy. Sadly, this is the part where he tries to butt in, tell me I'm wrong, and that I'd probably enjoy having a boyfriend because he loves having a girlfriend. Ha. Ha. It was an amusing conversation the first time.

Will certainly knows how to make perfectly nice small talk awkward. At one point I informed him it was supposed to snow anywhere up to a foot the next weekend... he comments, with a rather sly note in his voice, that it's definitely cuddle weather... and that he didn't have anyone to cuddle with. Ugh. I respond with laughter (what else was I supposed to say?).

Will certainly knows how to make an innocent knock at the door scare the living daylights out of me. I was innocently cutting open a roll for a mini-sandwich when there came a particularly loud knock at the door. All of us ignore it... we don't really care who it is... we're pretty much stressed out of our minds... The mysterious visitor knocks again, this time more urgently and desperately. Jackie opens the door. From the kitchen, I hear Will's voice sounding off a rehearsed-sounding speech about how it's nearing finals and thus he is giving away free hugs and if anyone here wanted a hug.

Now see, I am pretty much famous in the ward for hugging everyone at the slightest excuse... I am well-known as the hug-lover. (In fact, as a silly side story, I was so tired the other day that I walked past my guy-friends Erik and Ryan without seeing them. Erik called out to me and asked if I was okay... I say I'm just tired, which was an understatement. Erik then asks if I'd like a hug... well, of course I did! I gave Erik a hug/ Erik gave me a hug while we were both walking, which proved difficult because he's so much taller than I am. It turned out to be the funniest hug I'd ever had. Immediately thereafter Ryan complains about not getting a hug, so I gave him a walk-hug too. Will was behind us somewhere watching...).

Back to the story, forgive me for the sidetrack. Well, Hillary bolts into the kitchen. I have told her all my suspicions about Will, and she pretty much... well, she feels sorry for me. She whispers to me urgently, "Jenna! We have to get you out of here!" She shoves me out into the twenty degree cold with knife and roll in hand without a sweater or jacket of any sort as I hear Will asking, "Is... is there... any one else here that needs a hug?" The door shuts and I am suddenly a very cold hobo with enough food for half a meal. I realize I have no keys either. I looked around at the snow... watched my breath for a while... watched the fog in the window... It was very uneventful. Then, Hillary suddenly pulled me back inside. We all looked at each other for a second... then Jackie and Hillary burst into laughter.

They launched into a narrative of Will's visit...they mentioned several times that he actually came into the apartment and looked into my bedroom to make sure I wasn't there. I wasn't sure I liked the drama that was happening, but I figure that's what I get for living with five other girls.

So, I'll be home late on Friday, December 21! I can't wait to see you all, and we should definitely hang out! :)

Mini-Story

Hallelujah!

I am done peer-editing Erik's paper after much procrastination. Erik wasn't there... but Roy and Ian were, and I said goodbye as I happily skipped down the stairs of Shipp Hall, the men's hall in my ward.

I make it safely to the ground floor. This is quite an achievement for me... I'm not much for agility or grace.

I burst out the front door of the Shipp into the cold, but I am elated. And then.

Without any warning whatsoever.

I am soaring through the air, almost gracefully. I mean the only oppositional force acting upon me here was the gravitational force (and perhaps a negligible air resistance), so my center of mass executed a perfect parabola... until my knee hit the concrete, sending me into a spectacular somersault onto the grass, where I land, spread eagle, facing the Shipp.

The grass is quite cool and comfortable. I am slightly bewildered as to how I got there though. I tilt my head up at the Shipp and inspect my surroundings. A teeny little set of three stairs in front of the hall wave at me gleefully. I suppose it's not often such a small fleet of stairs gets a victim. I was thankful that there was only one passersby at the time.

I don't remember my foot hitting the pavement, but now my shoe is sporting a large hole where my big toe should be. My palm is also stinging.

I get up clumsily, and after regaining my balance, I skip the remainder of the way home. Once home, I pull up my pant leg and inspect my knee.

Ooh, a skinned knee!

I clean my wounds with Rachel looking on. We decide my unfortunate fate had something to do with waves of manliness (or perhaps gorgeous) that hit me from behind, causing me to splat on the pavement.

Moral of the story: All those guys in the Shipp should be a little less manly and/or gorgeous for my safety.

Oh man, oh man! It's snowing! Hard core!

Eehehehee!
Snow! It's snowing. Everything is turning white! Ahahaa! And we are already having snowball fights! :)
I also built a snowman.

Anyway, that's it for recent developments. In less recent news we have a few mildly interesting stories...

The Orchard
So... my Book of Mormon class has a party at my professor's orchard. Fun fun.

We pile out of the big university vans and toward a huge table full of raw hot dogs and hamburgers. Brother Wilson's first question was, "Soo.... who wants to cook?" He said this while motioning toward a big barbecue. Okay, so all the girls shrink away, probably thinking about how manly a job barbecuing things is. So I look over at the boys... Oh dear. They are also shrinking away from the grill as if it were toxic. Looks like a job for... JENNA THE BURNINATOR! I volunteer. Oh joy. Now I am slaving over the grill, hoping NOT to burninate anything. Then everyone saunters off into the depths of orchard... and I am left all alone.

Well, of course smoke follows beauty. And since I was the most beautiful (and only) person there, all the burger smoke drifted right in my face. Coughing, I finish grilling and look around. I'm all alone with the food... but I hear screaming and laughing farther in. I abandon the food and run off to find my friends.

There it is.

The zipline of death.

I approach as Roy comes zooming down. He is caught, and then Michelle goes. She is caught by a few guys. I stand next to Zach. "Have you gone yet?" he asks placidly. "No, I was grilling, remember?" "Ohhh... yeah." Eventually, I say, "Okay, I'll go I guess."

Everyone seems quite excited that I'm ziplining. Why? I wonder. Everyone was going, and no one seemed to excited, except for when Helen went Superman-style.

I jump on. Backwards. Just to mix things up.

Roy and Clifton start pulling me up to the top. I look down when we reach the top. "We're gonna race you, okay?" Roy yells up at me. I laugh. "Go ahead." They launch me... and take off as well. Hm.

I am falling backwards, and it wasn't as exciting as I though it'd be. So... just to make things more exciting, I started kicking and yelling like I was about to die.

That did the trick. ZOOOOOOOOM! I hear screaming behind me. THUNK! I hit the either the knot in the steel rope or a body, I'm not sure. I bounce high in the air, my feet just barely missing Erik's poor face. My head also missed the ground by a single centimeter.

I am out of breath from laughing so hard. Hillary is hyperventilating. "JENNA!!! Don't ever do that again! If you had gotten hurt I would have been legally obligated to help you!" Apparently she's medically trained... and just had my life flash before her eyes. Which I think is weird since she knows nothing about my life... :)

Hillary and I walk back over to where the food is. I grab myself some food and make my over to the campfire. Fun, I guess.

I get bored quickly... so I call up my Dad and talk to him.

Then things get boring again.

So... Brother Wilson brings out the marshmallows, looking warily at me as he sets them out next to the roasters and the campfire. I smile. "Don't worry... Rachel is here to duel with." Brother Wilson, a little relieved, leaves me with the marshmallows. I start roasting them.

Now I don't really like marshmallows... I just like burning them. I say so. Brother Wilson laughs. "Jenna, you missed your calling. You should have been a cub scout!" I look up at him, saying quite seriously, "Well, sorry, I wasn't born a boy."

There is laughter. I happily burninate the marshmallows. Hillary comes to burninate them with me. So does Ryan. I talk with Ryan for a while. We get into a debate about -- hair? He insists it takes guys just as long to do their hair as girls do. After unsuccessfully trying to persuade him otherwise, I just shake my head.

Then... there is an apple fight. BAMMM! Ryan is pelted. I laughed, and I would have joined in... except I'm already covered in bruises (not sure why, I blame sleepdancing). Yay?

Ryan and I talk some more about the most random things. Smiles. (His photo-smiles are really creepy!) Also the potential deadliness of the marshmallow roasters. Then we all burst into songs and sang hymns around the campfire for about half an hour.

Then we set off for the vans so that we could go home. I realize that I haven't nicknamed Ryan.
"Hey! You don't have a nickname yet! I've nicknamed nearly everyone except you! There's Cliftonius, Tsar Alexander, The Willinator, Isaacle... but I haven't nicknamed you!"
"Uhhh...."
I pause. "My dad calls you Grape Man 'cuz I told him about how I asked you to preference!"
"Oh... Grape Man? Grape Guy? ... Grape Crush?"
I laugh.
"Oh wait... that sounds like... never mind..."
"You know I'm going have to call you that now..." I am laughing so hard on the inside because he doesn't realize how accurate this is. Poor boy.

He also promised to bring some Grape Crush (the soda) since I'm never had it before... and thus my childhood is not complete (I was wondering why I hadn't grown up yet). He starts trying to figure out where he can get it... ooh, he sounds serious :P I'm excited... for soda.

When we get back on campus and pile out of the vans... Ryan walks me home. I joke about getting kidnapped between his hall and mine (they are right next to each other). "Well, anytime you need an escort..." "Haha, 3:30 in the morning?" I say it jokingly... but he said he wouldn't mind much, he has to get up early anyway. I think this is ridiculous and tell him so. And then I go inside. Where I am immediately teased by my roommates. Ugh.



Preference

Hillary, Rachel, and I decide we all want to go the Murder Mystery dance in Heber. Hillary has a car, but with three couples... well, let's just say there's not enough seats and it's a forty-five minute drive.
"Okay... so who are we throwing in the trunk?"
"Robert's the smallest... he should go in the trunk!"
"Yeah... but... he's the date of honor. I mean, Hillary's the driver..."
"Oh... good point!"
"Oooh... let's throw Ryan in the trunk!"
Hillary pipes in. "You could sit on each other's laps!"
Rachel and I give horrified looks to her. In near unison, we both exclaim, "I'm not sitting on Ryan's/Clifton's lap!"
Hillary, wide-eyed gasps, and then says, "No no no no! I meant -- I meant that Rachel could sit on Jenna!"
This seemed much more... comfortable. To both of us.


Cold Hands

Oh man, it's cold today. Jackie and I run off to the central building to exchange our dollar bills for quarters. On the way back, I realize my hands are pretty much frozen.

"Argh!" I say. "My hands are freezing! I need a man on both sides to hold hands with!" Jackie laughs so hard.

Later tonight, Jackie comes home, with bright red hands and covered in snow. "Ahhh! I need like... five warm coats and a boyfriend!"

So... we, the women in 126 Robison Hall, have come to the consensus that boyfriends are good for keeping warm. Except none of us have one :P



Well, that's all folks! I hope I'll actually have something interesting to write about next week! (I should, the preference dance is next Saturday!)